To Wander And Ponder

Yesterday, after completing my outdoor morning chores in record time, I was left to my own devices because, at first, I needed to go to the local Ace Hardware store for some copper pipe and Lisa didn’t find the offer to accompany me a worthy adventure.

But since I had found that the copper pipe in my back trough – please, my Bronx friends, stop giggling, that was not a double entendre – seems to be working at keeping away the algae, I decided to place an equal length in the front trough (and a smaller bit the indoor trough).

Well, as with anytime I am left on my own, I hopped into my Toyota (yes the one from the books) placed my body on auto pilot, left my lizard brain in control of my basic survival, and let my non-local mind wander across the galaxy. Whenever this happens, I am always amazed when I snap back to consciousness to see something interesting before me.

Like on the way to Berthoud yesterday morning. I returned to consciousness to find not one, but two antique cars driving in the lane before me. Of course, the first thing that came to mind was that I had jumped interdimensional time lines again. But since NoCo has just been one big mystical adventure for me since I arrived in 2017, I just went along with it. Luckily Berthoud itself has not changed much since early last century, and I found my way to the Ace Hardware location by passing through all four blocks of downtown on the main road and making a left at the train tracks. Voila, I was returned to the present, located my Ace Hardware store where it has been forever and picked up the pipe.

But, not before stumbling upon a really cool Lion’s Club Bike and Car show along the train tracks directly across from Ace (and also my absolutely favorite breakfast burritos place, Benny’s Tacos).

It was if those old cars from the 1920s had led me here.

Note, that the two old cars that led me here were not at the show. Cue Twilight Zone theme.

But I fell in love with this old Ford Roadster. About the same vintage as the other two Fords.

Anyway, I did have another thing I wanted to do yesterday. There was going to be this huge Psychic Fair Saturday and Sunday at the Boulder Fair Grounds but when I tried to interest Lisa she again shot me down, but in order to ensure I would still be able to fuck off and go to it solo, instead of being subjected to a Honey Do List, I made the project a Longmont twofer and said I would swing by Walmart’s on the way home and do the weekend shopping.

Luckily, at that particular moment, Lisa was too absorbed in the latest news to pay too much attention, so I snuck out before she really noticed I was gone.

Well, when I got to the Fairgrounds, I was dismayed to learn that the Psychic Fair would not start for a few hours, but since the day’s theme thus far had been unusual cars, this location did not disappoint, capturing the otherworldly theme of the event.

At first, I thought it could be my frenemy, BC. But after observing it for a few minutes, I realized whoever was inside was either sleeping or dead, and I wasn’t going to get close enough to get kidnapped or killed.

But the trip was not a complete boondoggle, for in another part of the very large fairgrounds there was a huge Farmers Market going on. So, since I had already parked and was faced with walking a quarter mile back to my car, with nothing to show for it, I decided to peruse the packed corridors of white tents that were chock full of delicious smelling, locally grown and cooked foods, like an Arab Bazaar. It was also packed with tourists from other countries who were walking and videoing the spectacle. It seemed like every fifth person had their camera phones working away. Since I did not want to look like a foreign tourist, I left my videoing for when I was walking alone in the parking area while recounting my thoughts. Like a New York Schizophrenic.

I posted those videos on my FB page.

https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1CdGWNP96V

And I actually stopped at three of those tents to procure various parts of what would make a wonderful Italian meal – home made pasta, home made eggplant parmigiana, and homemade red sauce (or gravy, if you are Bronx Italian).

However, since it was all fresh, I didn’t want to leave it sitting in the hot car, so I raced home to show my lovely wife the spoils of my adventure, and begged her to prepare the meal. The eggplant had to be cooked in the oven and I don’t know how to turn it on.

However, I told her that I would spend my time productively while she cooked making a long trip back to Longmont so I could do the Walmart shopping – including a loaf of Italian bread – that I had earlier promised – and failed – to do.

And that last trip was the most productive part of my day.

Being a male, and thus a creature of habit, I have a set route to my Walmart shopping.

I always start at the far left front of the store, in the pet section, where I get all of the fresh and delicious goods for the Beagle Brothers and the feral cats (and my neighbor’s pilfering dogs).

Then its directly across the back of the store to the far right, where I get the dairy for my coffee, my probiotic yogurt, and the crackers for the mules, then up through each of the grocery aisle as I make my way to the front of the store and the fresh veggies section for the mules.

But as I cross the back of the store each trip, I always glance quickly to my left as I pass the most sad and lonely aisle at the very back of the building. It is the book aisle.

Alas, Walmart carries my books in their on-line store but not in their brick and mortar shops. Which is fine because in nine years I have never seen a living human in the book aisle.

At least until yesterday.

I almost got whiplash as my peripheral vision caught sight of an adult sized form. Indeed, I thought I had imagined it, so I turned at the next back of the store intersection between pallets carrying low priced flat screen TVs – which is why no one is reading – and headed back to the book aisle.

And there she was, as rare as a Writer’s Sasquatch, this wonderful young woman holding a couple of paperbacks in her hand while looking at some more on the shelf.

She didn’t even notice my approach until I said, “So, what do young women like you like to read?”

She spun around with a slightly embarrassed smile and volunteered, hesitantly, a couple of pop fiction and fantasy titles she was holding. I was glad it wasn’t pepper spray.

Bingo.

It appeared that this young lady was back in the area for the summer – which I deducted means she is in college – and volunteered that she loves to read and even has a book group where ever she lives when she’s not back home.

This was a young Unicorn.

I went into my well oiled spiel about being a local writer and all about The Claire Saga and she seemed captivated. She even pulled up the books on her iPhone with the hand speed of a conjurer. I guess she was making sure I wasn’t completely full of shit.

She also promised to check out the books and even pitch them to her book group.

Before we headed off in different directions, she shot a selfie and I gave her my number and told her to send the photo to me so that I could post it on the blog.

She did and I now have.

Thank you Teagan for being a reader. Tell all of your friends.

Well, that made my day. You see, I’m never going to be the next JRRT or JKR or GM if I don’t capture the cult interest of the college kids, like Teagan.

If this means I do it one kid at a time, well, so be it.

And the other good news is that the Psychic Fair also continues today at 12 pm, so if I can distract my wife just enough, maybe I can sneak out and get a second shot at some fun and mystical woo-woo.

But first some chores.

I hope that you fine, five readers have absolutely nothing on your plates except relaxation. Use the God excuse. A Day of Rest.

But no matter what else we get up to, let us make today a great one.