The Claire Fatwa

For those of you fine, five readers who may just be tuning in to these blogs, the above is my lifelong nemesis, Brian Corry a/k/a “BC.”

He is a founding member of the Old Fucker’s Club.

And while he didn’t live with us – me, Joe Serrano and Mark Lenahan – at Aunt Violet’s Flop House on Tyndall Ave, he spent a lot of time there as part of our crew, as well as regularly crashing overnight with my family a few blocks away at the seat of the McCaffrey Clan on Mosholu Avenue in Riverdale. He literally came and went at that house with the freedom of blood family and was always more welcomed there than I was. My mother even did his laundry.

BC was introduced to the neighborhood through Fordham Prep High School by another friend, Jack Vaughan, who also appears in FJM as Robbie Maclaren. BC first arrives in FJM on page 136 as Brian Kelly. We all had a hell of a lot of fun growing up together. (Now I have to remind everyone that the stories in The Claire Saga – especially FJM – are totally fiction.)

But BC had first made his appearance in TCS under his real name and initials as the Voldemortian level archvillain, BC, in KMAG.

BC was one of the first members of the OFC to track me down in NoCo after TWA dropped in 2021. Joe, Stein and Eileen C followed along shortly afterwards.

Lenny had remained more of a constant in my adult life throughout the years, so he found his way into TCS from the jump.

I had just submitted the AAA manuscript to BRW, but I knew there was another book brewing somewhere in the ether of the back of my mind.

So, I asked the OFC if they would like to appear as characters in my next book. But I explained that they had to be bad guys – except Eileen C – whose mother Mamma C had been a surrogate mother to me in my late teens and would curse me from heaven if I made Eileen an evil character. (But I did slut EC up under a different name in FJM)

The OFC all agreed.

Now here’s a little bit more back story. BC was my Tyrion Lannister growing up, just four times taller. BC is loyal, intelligent and witty and is the type of friend who always tells you the truth, even when you don’t want to hear it. That particular “honesty” quality can be extremely wearing, especially since BC would share his unerring analysis usually right in the middle of when the shit was hitting the fan. However, to give him his due, his counsel has caused me to change course a few times at just the right moment and probably saved my life along the way.

But as brilliant as BC was, his loyalty was stronger than his good sense, so if you chose to ignore his counsel and do something crazy, he was in for the ride.

But just to pay BC back for those little annoyances back in the day, I made him the most evil and dastardly of the bad guys in KMAG, and those of you fine, five readers that have gotten through Book 3 of TCS will know what I mean.

But, true to form, BC was game. So as I publicly chastised him with threats of a Claire Fatwa in the real world because of his actions in the literary world, he embraced his role and responded – including here in the comments to my blogs – with fun and wit. Like Spy vs. Spy in Mad Magazine. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spy_vs._Spy

There is a running theme that in response to Claire’s Fatwa, BC – who used to drive an Ice Cream truck in our youth – would preemptively attempt to take me out with a similar “milk truck” when I least expected it.

Over the past few days (see the blogs) we have reignited the Fatwa to include Sasquatch.

In true BC fashion, he has made some hilarious comments to the blogs, but then yesterday he sent me the following message in a separate text:

“Tom, Just read your blog.  Wonder if you could ask your fans and followers who go out hunting in bear season if they could please try to just wing me with a leg shot if they happen to see me while I’m out posing as a Bigfoot in that outfit to hide from your Claire/Bigfoot combo fatwa.  Because that Caddyshack blazer is a rental with a hefty deposit.“

So, you see, while my madness may be congenital, it was nurtured along the way by personalities like BC, who still plays an important part in my life and imagination. And I will always be thankful for that.

But boy, was it fun resolving his character.

And the Claire (and now BF) Fatwa is on!

So, my fine, five readers, get about your Saturday errands. Enjoy yourselves when you finish checkiing off the list. And then do something fun, like read.

I’ve got veggies to prep, and then outdoor chores.

But before I get to that, kitty cuddling and rounds.

No matter what else we all get up to, let us make today a great one.