Man Plans And God Laughs

Yesterday started out well enough. After the early morning chores, I went into town to grab some delicious veggie burritos from Benny’s (highly recommend) – Betto the proprietor is a pleasure – and spotted George, the man holding the stop sign, who was there to help direct a bike race going through town a little later that morning. I liked how George and his single command looked juxtaposed just across the street from the Soul Soliciting Christians on the far corner, and thought it would make an interesting photo. It did.

I’m sure there is some subversive message buried there.

I also found and posted an excerpt from the Gospel of Thomas –

whose words were not included in the Bible because it was deemed to contain Gnostic (spiritual) ideas that conflicted with the established Christian doctrine of the time, specifically regarding the nature of Jesus and salvation – if you throw the Biblical doubting Thomas into the mix and you wonder why I follow a more natural path. It’s in the name.

God noticed and acted accordingly.

I returned home to what was perfect and sunny but cool weather and sat under The Old Man drinking my coffee and eating my burrito while pinned in my chaise lounge by Smokey and Bandit,

but still was able to enjoy the upwards view of the sunlight through the leaves and the Jack The Spruce Grotto if I turned my neck sharply to my left.

I was hoping that my day would remain this peacefully blissful.

However, earlier that morning I made the mistake of mentioning to Lisa that there was a Music and Arts festival in the nearby town of Hygiene – yes, the location of Helen and Bobbi’s home and restaurant in The Claire Saga – and then continued my chores by driving to Longmont to pick up some wood shavings for Claire and Honey.

When I returned to Casa Claire I was met by the devilish sounds of urchins, as Lisa decided in my absense that we should take the grans to the Hygiene festival. My beautiful DIL Georgie, was more than happy to accommodate her MIL and dropped them off without turning off her car.

I could hear God chuckling in the clouds above, as the temperature suddenly, drastically climbed to give me a taste of what Pete Sheridan and the Good Hitchhiking Reverend Zach Scott Smith assures me awaits those who refuse to properly repent, or as Pete alternatively offers, at least takes a few millennia in the Purgatory sauna to atone.

Undaunted, I packed them all into Lisa’s car with as much terrifying swearing as I could muster – met by their equally terrifying cackling – and set off to find the rows of tents and milling locals in the wonderful town’s center.

I love to support local artisans and found one tent manned by the Hygiene version of the Golden Girls who made really cool crocheted toys, that my grans insisted they needed. The ladies were a feisty bunch, whose tricolored coiffed ringleader was an avowed ex-hippie from Marin County in NW California who swore she sold real estate, which I countered with my interpretation that she must have been the person who welcomed the lost of our generation – who had not yet stumbled on Barker Ranch – to her commune. They were a lot of fun, giving as sharply as they received – so much so that I was so busy bantering that Lisa led the grans away and in my rush to catch up I forgot to snap the GG’s photos. Ladies, if you read this, it was my absolute pleasure. Buy my books!

I caught up with wife and grans at the Hygiene Feed Store

Which also makes an appearance in TWA, and where the grans were engaged in some nifty face painting.

by a lovely young artist who must have taken her fashion cues from the Halcyon Days of the previously mentioned Golden Girls – everything old is new again – which is perfect, as I loved the female hippy style of my youth.

Properly artistically amended by war paint, the girls were then entranced by a lovely woman who explained the wonders of the different kinds of baby goats in the petting zoo.

But by now Hygiene’s temperatures had matched the Sahara’s, so we tossed the rug rats into the car and bought them lunch at their favorite establishment, Five Guys Burgers in Longmont.

and a short while later, tossed them all out of a moving car as we passed their parent’s home.

Back at Casa Claire, this old Mick was exhausted by the outing and the heat, and wanted to just put his feet up.

But God knows that there is no rest for the wicked, so I still had to unload and move the 8 bags of wood shavings from the back of the waiting Toyota – yes, from TCS series – down to the barn at the height of the heat, which did not seem to be bothering mules or dogs.

I also had to open and spread a few bags in the barn to ensure the creatures had fresh shavings to cool their bodies as they rested.

I then had to return out doors one more time to put out their dinners, and Claire and Honey watched me pass in wonder, no doubt thinking to themselves that an Irish Donkey never retires. A beast of burden until his last breath.

And, a few hours later, when I finally peaked out my bedroom for one last supervisory gaze around the property before I retired for the night, I spotted one of the Charlie Brown’s Halloween Characters floating in the branches of one of the trees.

No doubt placed there by those mischievous Fae as a wind up. Bastards.

Anyway, I hope God got his humorous lessons out of his system and will allow me his day for some peace and rest.

I hope you fine five readers get to enjoy some R&R as well. May I suggest some enjoyable escapist reading – you can start with a free read of TWA –

Just a few free clicks and you are off on your adventure.

But, no matter what else we get up to, let us make today a great one.